A New Year and New Goals

HAPPY NEW YEAR! I know it's a few days late but heck I was enjoying the holidays! Can you believe it is 2017?? My mind has not caught up and now I have to write a new year on cheques! 

Was it just me or did anyone else feel the holidays this year just fly by? I seriously felt like I blinked and it was all over with, is that a good sign or a bad one? I really enjoyed having the hubs at home for 2 weeks. We got lot's done and had lots of fun, stayed up way to late every night, but it was worth it. 

Now back to reality and back into a routine! Sorry it has been quiet over the last few weeks, what can I say... I enjoyed my family and really didn't think too much about writing on here. I did manage to post that wonderful dessert the No Bake Gingersnap Cheesecake Cups. Those were honestly so so so so yummy, I would have eaten a few of them but I made the right amount for the company we had over. Which was great because no waste, but was bad because I couldn't eat one later... maybe that should be counted as a good thing as well.

So the big thing that is on most people's minds around the beginning of a new year are goals or resolutions!

To me the word resolution is an action word, you set a goal and follow through. Resolutions only work if you have a plan and put it in motion and act. I have been a big goal/resolution setter for pretty much my whole life. When I look through all my old journals and notebooks I have my lists of "what I want" or "this year I will". What is totally funny is I married a man who does not like setting goals. He is just a go and do person, he doesn't like writing it all down and saying "by this time x y and z needs to be done". He has hopes, dreams and desires but he just does them. I really admire that with him.

Me on the other hand I am a visual person who often needs to look over my written down goals. My husband often laughs at my various notebooks for different purposes that have many lists. I will tell you though there has been many times where he has asked me to look through my old lists so we could find certain things. They do come in handy! One thing I admired from Rory Gilmore in the Gilmore Girls show was how organized she was. I was such a scatter brain as a teenager. I had lists but I never really followed through. It wasn't until I decided to go on a mission for my church that I really picked up following through and being organized. Now I always have my notebook with me and my daily planner. Actually that is one of my favorite stocking stuffers from the hubs is my year daily planner!

I couldn't find all my planners because a bunch are packed away but the cream coloured is my newest and the others are from the last 3 years. 

I find that I just haven't had a lot of time for journaling over the last 5 years (kids I tell ya) so my daily planners have become almost a journal to me. I write little notes on the days when things happen, the kids weights, and fun little sayings. It helps me have a resource for that stuff because I don't write as often in my actual journal anymore.

Okay well lets bring it back to what I wanted to share with you all today, my goals and resolutions for this upcoming year and how you too can make some goals and follow through this year. I guess I feel if I put it out in the interent world it will help me stay more accountable.

I had looked at old goals and past resolutions and there was a common theme, they were all very self centered and self serving. I am not saying there is something wrong with having physical goals focused on your body and losing weight or getting healthy. I find those goals to be life changing and can undo years of treating your body like a garbage can. What I mean is "I want to lose 50 pounds this year" "I want to look like such and such" "I want" "I want" "I want"

Do you see what I am seeing, ​the reason why I picked the ones that I did is because quite frankly I am tired of focusing on physical goals, meaning body changing related goals. I would put a lot of pressure on myself and would often feel like a failure when my body just wasn't cooperating, or I didn't look at my body with respect and looked at it with more self loathing. Yes I am going to get real with you, I have a love hate relationship with my body like most woman do. My relationship with my body has been more hate then love for the last few years. Which is sad because a grew two beautiful perfect babies and was able to give birth to them, even though there was some complications during birth they made it here safe and sound. How amazing is it what our bodies can do and then to be able to nourish those little ones with what my body produces and provides for them blows my mind.

My body is BEAUTIFUL.

Yes I have stretch marks, I have actually had them since I was 14, they aren't from babies. I had majour hormonal imbalances when I was younger that caused me to gain 50 pounds in the matter of 18 months. I did get a few tiger strips from having babies, Olivia I got three HUGE ones on my lower tummy, Colton one tiny tiny one on my side. But again they are a part of me, I don't care and my husband has NEVER cared.

I want all of you, whether you are a woman or a man, to look at yourself and love yourself every day. Tell yourself you are beautiful, you are amazing, you are LOVED. Love yourself so that you don't question whether others love you, love comes from within ones self, you won't be able to feel it from others if you can't feel it inside yourself.

I love in the book and movie "The Help" how Aibeleen tells little Mae this every day. Tell yourself those words everyday, love yourself.

My other goals I have, I feel are not only goals for me but goals for my little family, because not only will they help me they will help us grow closer together and grow closer to the Lord. In the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints whenever they talk about marriage the main focus is to keep Christ the center of our home. We have always made that a number one priority, my marriage with my sweet main squeeze has been a pretty smooth ride. We have had our trials but we always, always talk them through. But we can always work on things and always work on our relationship with the Savior. When we individually grow closer to him we naturally grow closer together.

This past year looking back, if one lesson I can take with me and let it change me is this: The only person I can control and change is myself. I am someone who peoples energy levels and energy that they give off, whether it is positive or negative really impacts me. My mom said I always knew when something was wrong because that energy that gets put out there I would feel it. A few things have happened this year that really has just hurt my heart, it can be hard for me at times to really understand why people do the things they do. I can't let that burden me down anymore, it was making me sad or anxious and my poor husband and kids could feel that from me. 

Who I can control and what I can control is my own heart, my own reactions, my own emotions and how I allow all of it to affect me. A great talk given years ago by Elder David A. Bednar who is an Apostle to our church was "Choose Not to Be Offended". I have been given the tools and advice on how to change me and my actions, so if something is weighing me down that I have no control over and is not in my control or a part of my personal life, then I need to walk away. That doesn't mean I shouldn't serve others or be compassionate and be there for people when they need it, I just need to not allow it to burden down my heart and soul. My emotional health and mental health is important, sometimes we need to know when to walk away and when to say "I can't" or to say no. 

I want you all to look at your goals, if you feel good about them then awesome! If you want to really make a meaningful 2017 then reevaluate what you are focusing on. When you make goals, they really should have thought and direction in each of them. Ask yourself:

What do I want out of these?

What is the final outcome that I want?

Who can also benefit from my personal goals?

Do my goals help better those around me?

At the end of 2017 did I set obtainable goals that I could reach?

Do my goals make me a better person?

​Goals can be self serving, I am all for having those goals like: crushing your 10km personal record, saving "x" amount of money so we can pay off debt, losing the baby weight, learning a new skill and so on. I think those are awesome things to focus on yourself as well, like I said LOVE yourself this year. I want to love myself along with loving the Savior and everyone around me.

Hope you all have a beautiful fulfilling year that helps you grow as a person so that you can be a positive influence in the world around you and to those you love.

*Hugs*